When Friends Become Too Much...



Following yesterday’s Blog, “Authentic Independence,” I mentioned being cautious of certain individuals.


First, be aware and beware of individuals who suck you dry emotionally.  Take inventory of who you are around and what they are doing to you, as well as what they are doing to your time.  Their presence in your life may very well be fine, I’m just saying to take a look.  They can help or hinder our energy that helps us take care of our own daily chores (in addition to caring for your loved one with dementia).  If you are left drained, either think about limiting your time with them, or letting them go altogether.  Is this a tough thing to do? Of course.  Absolutely. But our time is too precious to be robbed on any level.  “We meet people where they are, and sometimes we have to leave them there.” Iyanla VanZant


Secondly, if you have trusted friends who give their support and offer their help, accept it.  Early on in my caregiving days/daze, I made the mistake of allowing the past to dictate my present. I didn’t have help navigating alcoholism, so my current thought process with Alzheimer’s was, ‘Why in the hell would I have help with this?’  And to a degree, it was true, I didn’t have help so I continued to do everything myself. I didn’t reach out, even when I was taking classes on dementia and